A Note From The Writer

Welcome to the archived blog posts (when I was a wee blogger, wet behind the ears and not aware of spell check and various other gramatical structures!) I have kept the writings unedited or reworked as I am in the process of doing a massive rewrite of my entire life, many posts I have yet to publish and this blog was merely writing practise for the massive job of sorting out my emotions whilst retelling the story as cuttingly real and dramatic as the real memory was.. some of the posts contained are raw, streaming emotion.. many posts although painful to write, had a tremendously cathartic effect - cheaper than therapy one would say. I welcome new and old readers to keep in touch via my author email (sensualexplorersatHotmaildotcom) if you have any questions or wish to share the feelings and emotions raised by my work.
I will announce the publish date and title whenever it happens and I have been clean now for three years. It is possible.
But it is never easy. It's a lifelong journey, I will always be an addict, but I must stay one step ahead of myself and protect all that can be ruined in the eternal struggle to be
at ease once again, comfortable in this skin.
Thank you for being a part of my story.

Tuesday, January 11, 2005

This Just In

I am still going to maintain my commitment to your votes and to the nomination that you placed.
Therefore we are going to see this awards thing through to the end. No pressure to vote, I am not doing the same mistake twice. I recieved a lovely email from the organisers which made me reconsider my stance of the spirit of the awards. Organisers have already conceeded that next year things will be a little fairer and less full-on and I am happy with that. I don't mind if I win or lose and that was the calm I was searching for. You guys be on me if I start posting buttons and links ! Whether you decide to vote or not is up to you. It looks like we have a great chance at getting the design as the Leader may donate to us. He has donated 25$ to our paypal so I am donating it back to his breast cancer fund. As much as I maintain that I am not into selling out , I am more against being a bad sport. I need to also not let my illness be a crutch for me to not finish things that I have committed to. Long as we finish guys, let's cross the line together.

Thank you for the lesson of self- acceptance

Here is the email I sent ;

Hi guys

May I ask that you close down my nomination for most inspirational.
It has been an honour but I am no longer sure that the voting is a
true reflection of inspiration.
Just seems like a numbers game. I would rather the votes go to the
other people in my catergory, just in case I am getting votes still.


Can you please not make it look like I was kicked out ?
LOL ! Taa ! Plus it is personal reasons as well :)

Thanks guys

The Reply

We would rather you stay in and get a chance to win. In fact I know
for a fact that your are still getting votes. I have talked to Greg a
number of times, and I know he too would like you to stay in. Just so
you know, the prizes fall to the next person should the winner not
choose to accept them. Greg has already told me that he intends to
turn down the prize since he does not need it. If he were to win the
category, he has already said he is donting the prize to the next in
line. I, for one think you should stay in.

Please reconsider your position. If you get emails or comments or
anything else that is causing you grief, let us know. We will help.
You are still very inspirational. Dont let anyone else win, noit that
way. And for the people that have worked so hard to make sure to vote
everyday, they would be disappointed to see you drop off of the list.

Let me know if you still want to withdraw.


My reply

You guys are very nice.
Ok we are all in this together, I want to support you guys and be a good sport.

Thanks for being so kind and letting me make my own choice:)
I better go tell the troops.

Thanks guys

So you know what to do ! Release the Hounds... Just Joking.

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