A Note From The Writer

Welcome to the archived blog posts (when I was a wee blogger, wet behind the ears and not aware of spell check and various other gramatical structures!) I have kept the writings unedited or reworked as I am in the process of doing a massive rewrite of my entire life, many posts I have yet to publish and this blog was merely writing practise for the massive job of sorting out my emotions whilst retelling the story as cuttingly real and dramatic as the real memory was.. some of the posts contained are raw, streaming emotion.. many posts although painful to write, had a tremendously cathartic effect - cheaper than therapy one would say. I welcome new and old readers to keep in touch via my author email (sensualexplorersatHotmaildotcom) if you have any questions or wish to share the feelings and emotions raised by my work.
I will announce the publish date and title whenever it happens and I have been clean now for three years. It is possible.
But it is never easy. It's a lifelong journey, I will always be an addict, but I must stay one step ahead of myself and protect all that can be ruined in the eternal struggle to be
at ease once again, comfortable in this skin.
Thank you for being a part of my story.

Thursday, January 27, 2005

Cold Water

Musical score - Cold Water - Damien Rice

Long into the night, the rise and fall of our voices could be heard from behind the thin plaster walls of the Motel. The Ex wanted to know all about the betrayal and all about Marcus. He couldn't bare to doubt my emotions so he focused on the lust. He asked me to describe how nice his cock had felt inside me. He demanded to know when was the first time we slept together and how many times I had climaxed. I didn't want to talk about the details but it was the only way he could rest.

"Have you ever thought about him when I'm inside you?"
He reached up and and slipped the satin strap from my shoulder and kissed my shoulder, asking with his eyes.
"Yes." I said softly. It was strange to be so honestafter all the lies, bittersweet at best.
"Does he make love to you as good as I do?"
His hand dipped between my legs and I moaned softly and a smile played on his lips.
"No" I lied.
"Have you thought about being together -" he asked but I raised a finger to his lips to silence him. All I wanted to hear was the soft petals of raindrops, falling from the sky.

"Make love to me" I whispered tothe darkness, his hands swept over the gentle swell of my breasts. His sweet breath tickled the back of my neck, my nipples hardened, my thighs
blossomed apart to recieve his teasing strokes. A single tear slid down my face, make it all go away.
My hands encircle his neck, pulling his lips to reach mine. I kiss him as deep as love goes.
"I love you, I'm sorry" Is all I can say. He scatters kisses upon my shoulder blades and I buck my hips towards his firmness, pushing down with delicious. He lays me down on the bed, the sheets are slightly spattered with rain blowing in through the calico curtains.
"I just can't keep on the gear - you gotta do something babe. You gotta." I resume feeling his body, tracing my fingernails down his soft downy groin.

I taste tears, but it feels so good anyway. Tenderly he snakes a hand around my waist, lifting me onto him in one creamy scoop. So easily he slides in and we fuck so softly in the quiet, making a physical vow to only be with each other. It was the only way, I wrap my legs around him and pull him urgently into my swollen desire, but he teases me, slightly pulling out gracefully of my wet and throbbing need. I sigh even though it feels like heaven.
Gratefully, he builds pace and we move in perfect unison , it's always this good but this seems better than I remember. I feel my climax curve as a delicious orgasm shudders down my spine and renders me totally free, flooding the sheets. Pink and slightly sweaty I reach for him hungrily as we tussle between the sheets, kisses much more urgent and needy. Hours pass and many more times I orgasm, sometimes with tears streaming down my face.
I am breathless.
I am beautiful.
I am his .....Again.


There is no hero in my sky.

1 comment:

Garrison Steelle said...

Naked words wonderfully arranged to induce orgasmic thought.

Thank you.