A Note From The Writer

Welcome to the archived blog posts (when I was a wee blogger, wet behind the ears and not aware of spell check and various other gramatical structures!) I have kept the writings unedited or reworked as I am in the process of doing a massive rewrite of my entire life, many posts I have yet to publish and this blog was merely writing practise for the massive job of sorting out my emotions whilst retelling the story as cuttingly real and dramatic as the real memory was.. some of the posts contained are raw, streaming emotion.. many posts although painful to write, had a tremendously cathartic effect - cheaper than therapy one would say. I welcome new and old readers to keep in touch via my author email (sensualexplorersatHotmaildotcom) if you have any questions or wish to share the feelings and emotions raised by my work.
I will announce the publish date and title whenever it happens and I have been clean now for three years. It is possible.
But it is never easy. It's a lifelong journey, I will always be an addict, but I must stay one step ahead of myself and protect all that can be ruined in the eternal struggle to be
at ease once again, comfortable in this skin.
Thank you for being a part of my story.

Wednesday, December 15, 2004

Fuck It Like You Mean It

A couple of weeks ago I left a comment on Tony's blog regarding his FUCK audio post.
I added to the FUCK list in the comments (no-one asked me to but I know I am a tool so shutup)
Once I started saying the F word I found it totally liberating. So I am going to do my own and encourage you to add yours in the comments. I have added Haloscan so everyone can just chill out and not fill in all the sections. Erroneous flames will be baleeted. (Just sayin!)

fuck my parents
fuck doing the splits
fuck rent increases
fuck your polyphonic ring tone
fuck fifty cent and fuck in da club
fuck salads plus menu
fuck holes in my shoes
fuck the lag time on my drugs
fuck cigarette burns in the carpet that aren't fucking mine
fuck rebooting
fuck eyeliner crud under my eyes
fuck the bad seats at the movies
fuck the turd someone left in the office toilet for you
fuck the circus and fuck locking up animals for fun.
fuck anorexia and fuck bulimia too.
fuck carpal tunnel and fuck my adsl connection.
fuck all of my parking fines.
fuck Donald Trump (ugh)
fuck whitewash jeans and fuck lycra
fuck expensive drugs
fuck being censored
fuck the spoon position
fuck Jessica Simpson and fuck her sister too.
fuck spam and fuck hushmail ( hushmail is fucking gay)
fuck divorce and fuck custody
fuck his ex-wife and fuck her mother too
fuck poor quality headphones and fuck blowing a speaker
fuck the nightclubs and fuck your fucking expensive drinks
fuck muffin top pants and fuck girls that say fuck too much
fuck hillary duff and her fucking random sister
fuck electronic pets
fuck the people who cheat in boardgames
fuck bad Chinese and then fuck the cook for fucking up a fucking simple order.
fuck those pimples on my face
fuck my hot fucking unit and fuck this heatwave
fuck the critics and then fuck the skeptics
fuck my cold fucking fries
fuck it when you get grease stains on new clothes
fuck coffee breath and fuck that guy that smells like poo.
fuck the girl that needs to wear deodorant.
fuck blogger lately - fucking slow fuck!
fuck blog-explosion and fuck not being able to say Fuck.
fuck bad blow jobs and fuck her teeth on your cock
fuck the doctors and fuck their lame prescriptions
fuck my fourty dollar shampoo - fourty fucking dollars !!
fuck the office xmas party but don't fuck the boss.
fuck my BF ( erm. hang on. no - scratch that)
fuck family dinners and fuck all of the fighting about all the same fucked up shit.
fuck going to the fucking gym and fuck situps, push-ups and crunches. Worst idea ever.
fuck all the shit presents your gonna give this xmas
fuck all the shit presents you already have
fuck all of the late buses and then fuck the trains and even fuck the fucking ferry.
fuck littering and fuck people that throw cigarette butts out of cars in fire season.
fuck sweat and fuck the smell of it.
fuck guys that try and be my father and fuck me for asking for it
fuck people that think they are superior and fuck those that believe them
fuck my drunk dad and his fucking alcoholic mess of a life
fuck my step-brother - sick fuck and fuck his house stumps (so they fall down)
fuck press on nails - fuck them falling off.
fuck the lawnmower man outside my window at 5am
fuck my mum for ditching me and fuck that car she drove off in.
fuck spray on hair colour and fuck my regrowth
fuck Paris Hilton and her dog says fuck her fucking handbag too.
fuck my internet addiction
fuck our depression and fuck our anger at the conservatives.
fuck school reunions and fuck that girl or boy who broke your heart
fuck you for not getting over it
fuck me for pointing it out - what fucking good am I ?
fuck broken engagements
fuck not seeing your kids as much as you want
fuck negativity
fuck your dvd player - go on.
fuck your car , your fucking house and your fucking ipod
fuck minimum wage
fuck the shrinks and the fuck the prices they charge
fuck migraines and fuck stepping on a needle at the beach
fuck the junkie that left it there
fuck the hate and fuck it's judgment
fuck the pressure to be someone you are not
fuck your inbox and fuck excel spreadsheet and fuck that powerpoint too.
fuck not climbing a tree because your feel fucking too old
fuck choosing a man over your girfriends - fuck you when he dumps you too.
fuck the physical pain that some of my friends are in - fucking fix it
fuck jealousy and fuck anyone telling you what to wear this season
fuck queer eye and fuck stereotypes
fuck playschool and fuck not knowing my left and right
fuck spell-check and fuck the blogger version.
fuck guys that finger a girl too rough
fuck anal sex - it fucking hurts
fuck those that love it - I am so jealous
fuck bling-bling
fuck homophobia
fuck PeOpLe ThAts ArE ToTaLlY AwESUM-1 4 u
fuck html code and fuck my lame ass template
fuck level three on Jak and Daxter 2. Fucking impossible.
fuck you for forgetting to take your dog for a walk
fuck that child that is screaming in the doctor surgery
fuck my bikini line in summer and fuck the need to shave all together.
fuck my stale fucking biscuits. Fuck not again!
Fuck my broken fan and fuck my blown lightbulb.

fuck this post is long.
It's fun though ...I want you to try it !

I'm not bitter - really I'm not.
I just like to vent sometimes.
All good.

Fucking in Rythym and Sorrow,


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