Saturday, October 30, 2004
Original artwork by Mark Ryden. Images altered for personal and non-profit fan art.
*This post is not a memoir, it is what happened yesterday. I commented on the post before this one about what happened this weekend. I have basically lost access to seeing my partner's child due to my past and the risk to the children. I appreciate you asking the references , but no this is new pain in my life that I am trying to understand. Such is life.
I don't want you breathing on them.
I don't want your past around them.
I don't want them in danger.
She says it like nothing.. Almost with relish.
I don't care if you survived she said..
I only fear what you have been through..
Do you not have the pride that I do?
Or just the prejudice..
Today I made a hard decision to walk away from a very special person.
I am cut. I am bleeding. I am raw.
If this is as good as it gets, if I continue to be persecuted for what I did rather than who I am, then tonight I would rather be alone.
When she is older, I hope she understands.
That I would never put her in danger.
What is in my past - is indeed a memoir, something to share for good.
Not to trap into the darkness.
Sweet little girl, you deserve so much better. I am sorry your mummy won't understand that it is ok to be healing , it is ok to have a past..
Maybe when you are older , I can explain.
For now, play in the playground
I let go of your hand....now.
*Imagery is fan art by HG co/Mark Ryden.
Posted by Miss Behaving [badly] at 10/30/2004 10:48:00 PM