Morning. Second day not at work ! Omg the faccarde of my corporate desire is falling away to reveal a pyjama clad, coffee sipping truant/blogger. BF is not impressed. Ex-cellent.
Not that I know what I'm doing ! All I know is I want to write for a living and I want to not work in an office of a multinational company. It's doing my head in.
Stop whinging though, I know. A big part of me is going through reams and reams of "supposedly inappropriate" avenues for revenues, that would allow me to write.
*exchange knowing looks here* I mean how many times have I heard this...
"You know it's just not part of reality that you earn that much money, you have to put a price on your diginity - sweetheart."
" So what exactly do you do (insert probing laser stare) and don't you feel dirty about touching Those Men and letting them put thier hands all over YOU (insert distasteful grimace here)
That's how I got into The Skyscraper where I toil/work. It has been so agonising. Sometimes I just feel like I'm there for the BF, The Stepmother and The Future. But not for the HeroineGirl.
How can I ever make it to be the Heroine of the story if I have " writers block" ie: no time and energy and inspiration to write. It's been seven months since I finished up in the sex industry.
In the meantime I have always felt that I am trying to prove I can fit into the society "mould".
So yes I went back to it after I quit the drugs. I was on a point to prove as the money was still good and I saved alot more the second time around.
But I also spent alot of time on The Internet - doom doom DOM ! I said I would write and I didn't. ( Sheepish face ) What can I say, my mainline is online. But this time will be different cos I just HAVE to do this. I also attempted to start a study-at-home course *looks guiltily at the dusty textbooks propping up my monitor. *blush*
I met the BF online , so he dismiss the whole "internet addiction" thing. He thinks I am addicted to the internet * Duun Duun Daaaa!* No, I'm just obsessed with creativity.
To his credit, he is very supportive of my dreams, why it was only four weeks after I met him that he flawlessly helped me detox. It was not pretty and I'm still amazed we did it. A wonderful story ( I will cover later in the story)
He wanted to be called WK in this blog. I'm like No One will get that.
And besides - you can't choose your own Blog-anon. It's just not cricket.
Besides , WK seems a bit like wanker - lol.
WK is White Knight, which yes he is - but you don't tell them that.
Ok well sometimes.
I'm going to shower and pretty myself up ! Must do my bit for hygiene.
The BF just purchased a home entertainment package and set it up for me to watch my movie today. I can't wait to hear the SuRrOuND SoUnD. Car doors slamming right near my ears and sirens all over the shop! It's the simple things in life that really are the best.
Like movies and butter popcorn and a day off work, leading into a weekend.
Then some praline chocolate.
Ok be back soon, you go fix a snack and I will meet you back in 20 ?